Why Collaborative Divorce Feels Like First Class

Divorce is never easy, but how you go through it makes all the difference. Imagine taking a long flight. In coach, you’re squeezed into a narrow seat, waiting on someone else’s schedule, and left feeling drained by the time you arrive. That’s what traditional litigation often feels like: slow, stressful, and dictated by a system that doesn’t know you.

Collaborative divorce, on the other hand, is more like flying first class. The difference isn’t about luxury—it’s about experience, dignity, and choice. Instead of being pulled into a courtroom backlog where a judge makes decisions for you, collaborative divorce gives you space, guidance, and support for the journey ahead.

The IACP blog, Collaborative Divorce: A First Class Flight (read it here), tells the story of Jane, who found herself facing divorce later in life. Instead of being pushed through a crowded court system, she had the benefit of a professional team—attorneys, a financial specialist, and a coach—who helped her navigate the emotional and financial complexities with clarity and compassion. Her experience was private, efficient, and far less draining than the adversarial alternative.

This is what collaborative practice does best. It replaces courtroom battles with respectful dialogue. It brings in professionals whose sole mission is to help both spouses move forward without tearing each other apart. And it eliminates the pressure of a “win-lose” outcome, replacing it with creative solutions tailored to the family’s needs.

Another important benefit is time. Court cases can drag on for one or two years, leaving families stuck in limbo. Collaborative cases move at the pace of the participants. When you’re ready, the team is ready. That flexibility reduces stress and helps families begin healing sooner.

Of course, the process isn’t always simple. Collaborative work asks everyone—clients and professionals alike—to stay civil and focused, even when emotions run high. The IACP has another great piece on The challenges to maintaining civility and professionalism in the collaborative process and tips on how to overcome these challenges (learn more). It’s a reminder that civility doesn’t just benefit the professionals in the room—it benefits the clients who deserve a respectful path through one of life’s most difficult transitions.

For me, that’s why I believe so strongly in collaborative divorce. It’s not about taking the easy road—it’s about taking the high road. It’s about choosing a process where both spouses keep their dignity, preserve their financial futures, and make decisions for themselves instead of handing that power to a judge.

Collaborative divorce truly is a first-class experience, and for many families, it’s the best way to arrive at the next chapter of life with peace and confidence.