Can You Afford to Keep the House After Divorce?
Before you agree to keep the marital home, understand the mortgage, maintenance, and hidden expenses that could affect your financial future.
A recent HousingWire opinion article by Jeffrey Glass, “Housing policy ignored the cost of staying in a home,” (This article is behind a paywall, if you’d like access to it, don’t hesitate to reach out to me and I’ll get you in!) makes a point that deserves attention in divorce: the ongoing cost of homeownership needs a place in the affordability conversation.
The article focuses on housing policy. My thoughts went straight to the spouse sitting across the table saying, “I want to keep the house.”
I understand why. The home may represent stability, familiar routines, and a place where the children feel comfortable during an otherwise difficult transition.
But before keeping the home becomes part of the settlement, we need to understand what keeping it will actually require.
The mortgage payment is only the beginning.
When we discuss whether someone can afford the home after divorce, the conversation needs to include:
Mortgage payments, including any additional financing needed for an equity buyout.
Property taxes and homeowners insurance, counted separately only if they are not already included in the mortgage payment.
Utilities, garbage, internet, and association dues.
Routine maintenance, yard care, and recurring services.
Larger repairs and replacements, such as the roof, furnace, appliances, or exterior paint.
Cash reserves for unexpected expenses.
Some costs arrive monthly. Others show up as a substantial bill with very little warning. Both belong in the planning.
This can be especially important for a stay-at-home parent.
In some households, one spouse handles the finances while the other manages the children, schedules, and daily needs of the family. A stay-at-home parent may know exactly what it takes to run the household without having a complete picture of what it costs to maintain the property.
The same knowledge gap can affect either spouse, regardless of employment or income.
Perhaps one spouse paid the insurance and property taxes. Perhaps they handled repairs, maintained the yard, or knew the furnace was nearing replacement.
After divorce, those responsibilities still exist. If the departing spouse previously did the work, the spouse staying may need to budget for hiring someone.
That is why I encourage reviewing actual bills, maintenance records, and the condition of the home before making a housing decision.
Qualifying for the mortgage and living comfortably with the home are different questions.
As a Certified Divorce Lending Professional (CDLP®), I want the housing discussion to address both.
A mortgage qualification review does not replace a personal budget that includes groceries, transportation, childcare, healthcare, retirement savings, and the upkeep of the property.
Consider a hypothetical example: the mortgage payment includes taxes and insurance, but utilities, yard care, and a monthly repair reserve add another $700. That is $8,400 a year the post-divorce budget needs to support.
We also need to look ahead. What happens when support changes or ends? What repairs are likely in the next few years? How much accessible cash will remain after the settlement and any buyout?
Home equity has value, but paying a repair bill requires available funds.
These questions belong in the divorce planning process.
Before agreeing on who keeps the home, I want clients to understand its current expenses, upcoming needs, and how those costs fit their expected income and other obligations.
Sometimes that review supports keeping the home. Sometimes it shows that the plan needs different timing, additional reserves, or another housing option.
My goal is to help clients make a decision they can sustain. Keeping the home should support their next chapter, with enough room in the budget to live in it and take care of it.